


Poisoned

by FoxyWolfMeerkat



Series: Lay Me in the Back Seat Baby, I'm Fucking Dying [1]
Category: South Park
Genre: "kidnapping", Aged Up, Alternate Universe, Kidnapping, M/M, Master/Pet, South Park: The Fractured But Whole, Stockholm Syndrome, fluffy trash, trash
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-12
Updated: 2018-02-12
Packaged: 2019-03-17 11:33:43
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,484
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13658139
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FoxyWolfMeerkat/pseuds/FoxyWolfMeerkat
Summary: Hemlock is a strong hero. Just like all the other heroes. Of course.





	Poisoned

This has happened a few times. At first it'd just been some bad luck on the part of Hemlock. Or good luck on the Professor's part. Same difference really.  
The first plot wasn't that well thought out. Baahir woke up hanging upside down from a tree. How and when he'd gotten drugged was in the air but hey, Professor Chaos was a super villain. They knew how to pull off shady things like that. No, what really mattered was that with his powers, Chaos had effectively bucked him into a car with the keys in ignition. The guy was obviously preoccupied with the more important members of Coon and Friends. Like The Coon himself, or Mysterion. One guy with plant manipulation powers was not that special.

The next couple times Professor Chaos managed to capture Hemlock he had the good sense to lock the hero up in a slightly undersized cage in his hideout.  
"...Is this a dog cage?"  
Baahir felt his lip curl at the laugh he got as an answer. He assumed the way his stomach knotted up was nausea.

Other than that particular detail though, the man wasn't really that bad a host. Better than The Coon was at least. Not an achievement, but bare minimum reached. Baahir ate regularly, had water, was acknowledged by both the Professor and General Disarray. It wasn't much but he also had a blanket. (A really soft, warm blanket). He could get a second at request. The blond villain would even play checkers with him if he asked. Or chess, but he always got whipped at chess so he kind of leaned towards checkers.

Professor Chaos had a lot to talk about. Hemlock was quickly convinced that was the whole point of capturing people. Okay, not the whole point. The kidnapping always inspired a little bit of chaos. The team was short a member (numbers was something The Coon valued ever since the Freedom Pals split off from them officially during middle school). The fact that the man also got someone else to vent to was probably just a happy bonus, but it felt like more than that.

And boy could he vent.  
On and on forever it felt like. His so-called friends. His parents. Hell, his family in general actually. The Professor's civilian life was fucking awful. However, saying as much just earned Baahir a rebuffing. Incredibly fast backtracking. There were good things too: Presents, gestures, hugs, structure. They all seemed pretty shallow in comparison but Hemlock always kept silent. It was hard to figure out what to say to it all.

 

Two rescues later, Mysterion offered to teach Hemlock how to pick locks. He refused- it really isn't his MO. Not other reason and it's reasonable enough isn't it? He has to pull his lips in so he didn't giggle at the annoyed look he got. Whether his powers were real or not, Mysterion was a wonderful teammate for putting up with all the crap they had to throw at him.  
Especially Hemlock's continued streak of 'bad luck'.

The Coon points out that his continued captures compromises him. Makes him a potential spy and worse. A security threat. Seraph and Mysterion are nice enough to stand up for him and say he's strong enough to resist any of Professor Chaos' tricks. But The Coon has a point. Hemlock should say something. Should agree with him. He should care.

But he doesn't. Not when he's started to notice just how much Chaos makes him smile when things aren't so dour. He's sweet and enthusiastic and damn pretty. Cute and pastel. Too light blond. Too light blue. And the eye scar was... kind of sexy?  
Okay, so maybe he was sort of swooning over a freaking super villain. What was the real harm? He was a strong hero. It wasn't as if he would ever actually join Chaos! Not that the Professor would ever stop trying. It was a little flattering even, hearing how his powers weren't properly appreciated with the heroes. What incredible partners they'd make.  
Minor character no longer.  
They're holding you back.

 

Mysterion was only so patient though. Hemlock's luck only got worse and worse. Eventually others had to step in. Seraph for example- whose powers were not suited at all to stealthy rescue missions. Toolshed lent a hand once, but only once. Which was a grand shame seeing as he actually might've been even better at it than Mysterion was, or at least a really close second. The Human Kite tried but he may have been worse than Seraph was honestly. If not Mysterion, Speedy-McNew Kid wasn't a bad trade off Hemlock supposed.

Admittedly Baahir was not prepared exactly when the Professor changed up their routine. He had not been ready when he'd been bound and gagged and left in his closet overnight (the first time he'd ever seen where he rested on his off days). Just overnight. Just long enough to get to listen to him getting off. Then tossed out at the foot of his own apartment building the next morning. Baahir was not, not not not ready for the blue collar with painstakingly crafted white flowers clustered to it's side that he got a few weeks later.  
All praise be to God that Gary and the New Kid could keep their mouths shut. (Seraph was obviously judging him a little though. Snobby dick.)  
Least of all, Baahir was not prepared for just how... _into_ all the weird sex shit he ended up being. Especially not the food bowls. He just about died when they were presented to him (Chaos looked god damned smug too), but whether it was curiosity or some twisted up version of pride, Hemlock played along. Apparently Professor Chaos was unprepared as well, based on the fact that when he looked up at the villain again he was _violently_ red. Face down in a doggone dog bowl, a quick wink was all it took to make Chaos run for the hills.

Baahir would need to remember to thank Kenny for explaining how the hell flirting worked some time.

 

Lately, whenever he was at Professor Chaos' base, Hemlock got out more. On one condition: he had to show off for the other, perform with his powers. It was hard at first. Pulling plants out of his own freaking skin was kind of... Not unpleasant or even painful exactly. Just weird. He could feel it more than say, hair, but no leaf, vine, or thorn had enough feeling that plucking them off made Hemlock react any worse than he'd gotten pinched. Doing this for the guy should have bothered him a lot. Especially with the... undertones they had going right now. But it was really good practice. He felt more powerful and significant than he ever had in the past.

And maybe this was getting to be more of a thing than Hemlock would ever actually admit.

Well, maybe he'd admit it. Just not right now. Not yet.

Not even when the Professor would invite him to watch movies or spy on his friends. Lying back on the guy's chest, sometimes tucked under his arm like it's not the huge deal it totally is. He always knew he was sappy, but he'd kind of hoped that it would make him less prone to slipping as he aged. Figures.

 

The last thing that Hemlock wasn't prepared for is the whole team storming Professor Chaos' base. He's disarmed, because he always is here. Curled up in Chaos' lap when the banging knocks interrupt their shared silence. Baahir's barely thinking when he reaches for the lock box his whip is sitting uselessly in.

The other man stops him short of leaping up with a firm hand on his shoulder and a nervous smile.  
"Oh darling, you don't need a weapon when you were _born_ one."

It clicks then, strangely. Thorns prick through his skin, similar in shade to the flesh it's displacing.  
Order disrupted.

Butters is stiff. Anticipating the beating of a lifetime from the heroes. Their game come to it's righteous end.  
Hemlock doesn't think he's going to allow that. And what thunder pulses in his bones at the thought of fighting with him against so many. He stands himself up slowly as the storage door starts being pried open. Professor Chaos' pleased look on realizing sends lightning through his nerves, even just from the corner of his eye. Not that it'll make a difference, but the bark armor forming over his body does help keep his knees from shaking.

The Coon explodes when he sees them and figures out what's happening. "See!? I told you dumbasses! I knew we couldn't trust that terrorist son of-"

Baahir doesn't get pleasure from making Cartman bleed, but the fat asshole does have it coming.  
This was a battle of attrition, may as well get the people who deserve it the most.

**Author's Note:**

> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PcJ0r06ldYE


End file.
